Studies: Will had to go back to the midwest. Nothing
else could be done about it, so down the vein he
went. Walking for miles, from the airport to the
taxi rank. A big car drove by along the grey
concrete of the pedestrianised field. Black car,
big, sun on the bulges. "hey". "hey".
foggy. Thick and banded. Will lost his luggage
somewhere but there are more important things now.
Everything is wet outside the shopping centre, sliding
around hours before opening. Moaning from the roof of
||This isn't the
first bowel rodeo. Not for anyone here. The lights are
bright and the furnishing are like those in a church
meeting room or the sort of business you would never
feel comfortable telling people who worked at. Its so
bright you can see everything in the carpet. The photo
on the wall is of a lady putting on leopard print rubber
gloves, twang. she's looking away form the camera.
underneath is a box of leaflets, medical looking logos
you cant read from here. The text on the image is faded
through blue into nothing from the light. Dusty windows
doing nothing to stop the sun.
||It is all hard
work. That's the last thing you remember Will telling
you. There's not much more to it. Are you going to get
the job? You filled in all of the drop down boxes, you
remember doing that, you remember joking about how this
was maybe the work, but you were not sure whether this
was a test of how much you could do, how much you could
stand, or how much self respect you had. Thinking about
that you were no longer sure if you had completed the
banks of drop down boxes, or if you had even submitted
it for consideration. You had done some hard work
though, in that Will as always was correct. Time to wake
up then. You say this out loud a couple of times, before
fumbling toward the kettle and complimentary nescafe
sachet, already damp with dew.
to go to Church Ma/
Time to go to Church/
Time to go to Church Ma/
Time to go to Church/
Time to pay the bills Ma/
Time to ease the hurt/
Come and hold the light Ma/
Let's see what ya worth/
The ladies at the market, the ladies on the wall/
Keeping all the prices in the pockets of they shawl/
Open up the windows, open up the vein/
Throw the crying parson on out into the rain/
|It is windy. My god, it
is really windy. Black mass windy, put out the sun windy.
Not even cold, kind of balmy, but blowy. Like everything
wants to touch you on the one side and everything you down
seems to be the other way. Will has gone off somewhere
inside, maybe in the garage, you didn't see because you
were staring off at that field of some grain or something,
some animal feed crop. The wind putting a palm to the
heads of each stalk and laying them down without
acknowledging any resistance. This church is huge, and
Will has gone off somewhere and in this wind everything
feels like it is hanging out. A real lack of induction and
instruction seems to have marked this project. You don't
feel at all anxious though, the wind dominating, the white
noises in your ears, the pressure, feeling anxious seems
redundant as there's no agency to be wielded. Here in the
bowels, no visa for anywhere else but these bowels.
Waiting for church.
||All three of
us get in the car, sitting around the driver. They
smile and we try to smile back as the backs of legs
stick to tacky leather while trying to slide over. The
car is big and bulges in the same way inside as out,
reflecting the sun and just as hot. The vent does
nothing and the engine idles. We aren't late so I
imagine the driver is making a point, showing off the
car, the power of it, or both. I'm in the front seat,
you're in the back with Will. He looks tired. I can't
see your face because you're right behind me, but I
can feel your knees as you look for the seatbelt. Its
starts to rain and i put my arm out.
feels easy compared to the interview.
The position comes with housing. The food isn't bad and there's more of it than any of us could want. There's a chill every now and again like air conditioning but we're outside again and it doesn't feel like there is wind. We've been taking the medicine for three weeks now to aclimatise, and been doing the exercises when it didn't interfere too much with everything else. Off on the horizon there's smoke. It doesn't worry anyone when I point it out. Here in the flat land of agriculture, the horizon is a long way off. When the car disappeared it might have never existed.
into the field you lay down with the others. The light
is turning blue and that flattens everything while
bringing it either closer, or rubbing it out.